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Bridesmaid Duties and Etiquette

1/13/2016

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Today’s blog is geared to bridesmaids!  It happened, your childhood, high school or college bestie asked you to stand next to her on her wedding!  You are super excited to watch her try on gowns, pick a dress for yourself and be part of all the wedding festivities.  But when you said ‘I Do’ to be part of your best friend’s special day there is so much more you just agreed to.  As bridesmaid you agreed to the dress before you tried it on.  You agreed to helping with the bridal shower before a date was selected.  You also agreed to a portion of the cost of bachelorette weekend and the rare occasion the bride asks you get to grab votives from AC Moore.  It is a time to celebrate and support your bride and show her you can be there for her even when she makes you temporary BFFs with a few strangers.  It is 2016 and the original role of the bridesmaid tends to get lost in the younger bridal parties.   Ladies, here is a gentle reminder of what should and shouldn’t happen when you’re a bridesmaid.
 
Please do not tell or hint to your bride you don’t like the bridesmaid dress she selected for her wedding day.  There is a vision she is trying to achieve and you are just a part of that vision.  Wear what she needs you to wear with pride, she will remember how happy you made her because you simply cooperated.
 
Work well with your bridal party members.  Nothing will make the bride more anxious than finding out there is a catfight going on within her girls.  Help the MOH or sisters of the bride pull off amazing bridal shower and bachelorette parties.  So that means respond to emails, show up to the occasional bridesmaid meeting and speak up.  Truth is, unless you are family, you won’t see much of the girls after the wedding is over.
 
Be open with your bride about your concerns and financial situation.  Don’t ever give her or your fellow bridesmaids stern no’s.  Instead, without getting uncomfortable, explain why something may not work for you or why you’re apprehensive.  Saying no says you easily shut down without giving the subject any real thought. 
 
Most importantly, be flexible.  Past experience has shown me, brides cling to the bridesmaid who is most flexible, available and reasonable.  She is not picking sides, she is trying to stay sane until she can get down the aisle.

Wedding day should be totally easy for everyone.  But if needed, help to make sure everyone is at the hotel or mother of the bride's home on time.  Hair and make up should be done by the time you arrive to dress with the other girls (especially if you didn't use the preferred service found by the bride).  This last one is a biggie, make sure the bridal party is ready for pictures by the time the photographer shows up.  From there, all of your hard work has paid off, your bride is happy and the day is beautiful.
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